Formal vs Informal

Hello everybody!

Today I got to think about personal pronouns and how they are used differently according to the language you speak. I’ll clarify. I’m referring in particular to the personal pronouns (You-second person singular and plural/he/she) that we use in both formal and informal contexts. In our daily conversations using the correct form is important because it can denote intimacy, distance or higher/lower social rank. I speak four other languages, Italian, Spanish, Portuguese and Norwegian, and I’d like to explain very briefly below the use of these pronouns in formal vs informal situations.

In Italian, we use the pronoun lei (third person singular) in formal situations and we use it with people we don’t know, such as authorities or high-level professionals. In a conversation with friends and family, we use tu (you, second person singular) instead.

In Spanish, they use usted (you) as a formal pronoun. I’ve lived seven years in Spain and if you have ever had the chance to get to know Spanish people or live in their wonderful country you’ll have perhaps noticed how friendly these people are. In fact, even if the formal pronoun should have been used in formal situations, using an informal pronoun such tú (you) is still okay. But I did meet people, such as professors, who still like to use the formal way.

Instead, in some countries of Latin America, they still use usted even in informal instances or vos (you) from voseo (this is the use of the pronouns vos in place of tú or vosotros in combination with the verb conjugated in the 2nd person plural) .

In Norway, du (you) is always used no matter the context or social rank, like in English today. The form de is a very old form which is not used anymore, as thee in English.

In Portuguese, the general rule is the same as in Spanish : tu (you) for informal situations, você (you) for formal situations. But in Brasil they always use the formal way você/vocês (you-second person singular and plural) for both formal and informal situations. 

Personally, I like to use the informal way as in Norwegian and in English, I feel comfortable with it because I think that giving importance to social rank or expressing distance is not necessary.  Respect should not be defined by grammar or by the use of formal pronouns. We can respect someone simply by using the right words.

How amazing are languages? And how hard is it to learn and remember all those rules?

What do you prefer to use: formal or informal way? What do you think?

I would love to read your opinions.  

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Mi scusi? O scusa?

Hello Everyone,

Today, I would like to discuss the polite forms we use when speaking to people. Specifically, I am referring to the formal and informal ways we converse.

In Italian, we have the “tu” form and the “lei” form. What do I mean by these?

When we talk with someone we know or are related to, we use the “tu” form. When we talk to someone we do not know, an older person, or an authority figure, we use the “lei” form, which is considered a form of respect:

Formal: Mi scusi, lei sa che ore sono? (Excuse me, do you know what time it is?)

Informal: Come stai? (How are you?)

Let’s see how this works in the other four languages I know.

In Spanish, they have the “” form and the “usted” form, and they use them exactly like the Italians:

Formal: Usted sabe dónde se encuentra la farmacia? (Do you know where the pharmacy is?)

Informal: Sabes tú qué hicieron ayer? (Do you know what they did yesterday?)

In Portuguese, they use the “tu” form and the “você” form in Portugal, while in Brazil they mainly use just the “você” form:

Informal: Te quero (I love you)

Formal: Quero você (I love you)

But what about English? They have only the “you” form now. English once had a “thee” form, which dates back to Early Modern English. “Thou” was used for the subject, “thee” for the object, and “thy/thine” for the possessive. Although they use “you” for everyone today, they add “Madam” or “Sir” to indicate politeness:

Formal: I love thee (very old form) Informal: I love you

Formal: Thou worked all day long (very old form) Informal: You worked all day long

Formal: Thine dog is smart (very old form) Informal: Your dog is smart

Today: How are you, Sir?/ How are you, my friend? (Notice the difference?)

Finally, we have Norwegian, which now uses just the “du” form. Seventy years ago, they had the “De” form. Norwegians used “Herr” (Mr.) and “Frøken/Fru” (Miss/Mrs.), but they no longer do so, except perhaps with the Royal family. Today, they use the first name and last name at the first meeting and then just the first name in subsequent interactions:

Formal: De er vakker fru Hanne (old form) Informal: Du er vakker Hanne (today)

It is important to know these distinctions, especially when working with Norwegian-Italian interpretation or speaking in Italian, Spanish, or Portuguese. It can be challenging to remember to distinguish between both forms, as Norwegian always uses “du“, but Italian does not. When working for an Italian client conversing with a Norwegian professional, I have to use the “lei” form for the Italian customer. This means being proficient in my job and using the formal way with the Italian customer, while the “du” form is acceptable with the Norwegian person.

Curious, isn’t it?

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